When people ask me what I do for work and I say a “Life Coach”, I often get this assumption that I have found some perfect way of living. Of Being. Whatever that means to them.
Well, this is not the case for me (I do not want to speak on behalf of other Life Coaches) and with regard to the ones I know, this is not the case either. We have our lives…our experiences (or interpretations of experiences) that shape a lot of who we are and how we can help you.
I have been and consider myself a rather private person. Shielding others from the ‘real me” by hiding behind hard-earned certifications and accreditations. But I feel that this is not enough. I mean, who are you really working with when you work with a Life Coach?
I therefore feel it is time to share a few moments of intimacy in hopes to help others have a better idea of who they may be working with, leading to greater rapport, trust and success in partnering together, which leads to better results and outcomes!
So, Yes. I have formal education and professional experience, but it is the growth, learning and development I have cultivated during adverse times in my life that are more powerful than any formal education can provide.
So, I wanted to share a brief moment of intimacy:
I am a Life Coach.
Sometimes I go to my dad’s old hospital bed (still at his house), on which he battled a long time with Alzheimer’s and then passed. I have a good cry.
And I turn and lean in to the pain, letting my tears do their work.
Sometimes I wake up in the morning with a sense of doom, crippling me, and just want to stay under my comforter all day long. Perhaps…forever.
And I observe these unpleasant thoughts and associated emotions. I let them pass, like a cloud in the sky. They are temporary. They float away and the day gets better. It turns into a gift.
Sometimes I feel I am not a good Life Coach…and my self doubt takes over. What am I doing? Who am I to be helping others work through their situations?
I again observe these thoughts and emotions. They are just thoughts…. doing what they do. Passing by. And I remind myself of my values and then ask: who am I not to help others?
Sometimes I direct my emotions and displace my anger and frustration on others (usually loved ones, right?) only later to feel regret and guilt for how I reacted.
And I take time later on to process what happened, visualize the steps I will take next time to communicate better, and offer a sincere apology. I do this by taking accountability, listening and empathizing, making things right and taking the time to reflect and learn, making an effort not to react this way again.
Sometimes I feel shame looking at my self in the mirror. Despising the host that has carried me this far and discrediting it with hateful, shallow words.
And then I focus on everything this body has done for me, listening to my beating heart and breathing lungs that work endlessly, asking nothing in return but to be treated with dignity and respect. And then I give myself a hug.
Sometimes I feel I need to do more, be more. It’s never enough.
And I remind myself of the saying ‘remember the day that you wished for everything you have now” and “gratitude turns everything you have into enough”
Sometimes I feel so lonely, it is synonymous to the pain of hunger after not eating for a few days.
And then I go out and engage in purposeful kindness and give what I feel I do not have at the time. This soothes my loneliness like a large plate of Lasagna after a fast. A gesture of kindness and connection, even at the slightest, is all I need.
Yes, I am a Life Coach.
I am a spiritual being like you.
I feel pain. I fail. I fall.
I get it.
And that makes up the core of my qualifications.
I then reflect, learn, forgive, let go and move forward.
Thank you for reading and I hope this provides some insight into the secret lives of a Life Coach. Or at least mine. 🙂
I look forward to working with you😊